Math fun

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JWR
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Math fun

Post by JWR »

Modern Mathematics


Battle of the Sexes Math:

Smart Man + Smart Woman = Romance.

Smart Man + Dumb Woman = Affair.

Dumb Man + Smart Woman = Marriage.

Dumb Man + Dumb Woman = Pregnancy.


Office Math:

Smart Boss + Smart Employee = Profit.

Smart Boss + Dumb Employee = Production.

Dumb Boss + Smart Employee = Promotion.

Dumb Boss + Dumb Employee = Overtime.


Shopping Math:

A Man will pay $2 for a $1 item he needs.

A Woman will pay $1 for a $2 item that she doen't need.


General Equations & Statistics:

A Woman worries about the future until she gets a husband.

A Man never worries about the future until he gets a wife.

A successful man is one who makes more money than his wife can spend.

A successful wife is one who can find such a man.

Happiness:

To be happy with a man, you must understand him a lot and love him a little.

To be happy with a woman, you must love her a lot and not try to understand her at all.

Longevity:

Married men live longer than single men do, but are more willing to die.

Propensity to change:

A woman marries a man expecting he will change, but he doesn't.

A man marries a woman expecting that she won't change, but she does.

Discussion Technique:

A woman has the last word in any argument.

Anything a man says after that is the beginning of a new argument.

How to stop people from bugging you about getting married:

Old Aunts used to come up to me at weddings, poking me in the ribs and cackling, telling me, "You're Next." They stopped after I started doing the same thing to them at funerals.
"Like the wind crying endlessly through the universe, Time carries away the names and the deeds of conquerors and commoners alike. And all that we are, all that remains, is in the memories of those who cared we came this way for a brief moment." Harlan Ellison
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kittens
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Post by kittens »

That is funny :D :D
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Cloud
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Post by Cloud »

:-) :-) I am so delighted that you are amused, Japanese and also my name is very rare even in Japanese too l So sad.
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Not Sir Phobos
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Post by Not Sir Phobos »

Math makes my head hurt.
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