jokes for the ladies

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JWR
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jokes for the ladies

Post by JWR »

He said... I don't know why you wear a bra; you've got nothing to put in it.
She Said... You wear pants don't you?


He said... Shall we try swapping positions tonight?
She said... That's a good idea, you stand by the ironing board while I sit on the sofa and fart!

He said... What have you been doing with all the grocery money I gave you?
She said... Turn sideways and look in the mirror.

Girl 1... How many men does it take to change a roll of toilet paper?
Girl 2... We don't know; it has never happened.

Girl 1... Why is it difficult to find men who are sensitive, caring and good looking?
Girl 2... They already have boyfriends.

Girl 1... What do you call a women who knows where her husband is every night?
Girl 2... A widow.

He said... Why are married women heavier than single women?
She said... Single women come home , see what's in the fridge and go to bed. Married women come home , see what's in the bed and go to the fridge.
"Like the wind crying endlessly through the universe, Time carries away the names and the deeds of conquerors and commoners alike. And all that we are, all that remains, is in the memories of those who cared we came this way for a brief moment." Harlan Ellison
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In_Gabriel_We_Trust
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Post by In_Gabriel_We_Trust »

:rollin

No use in denying certain truths I guess.


(I still do need pants though ! )
[img]http://snapshot_city.tripod.com//sitebuildercontent/sitebuilderpictures/1ginjicool.jpg[/img] [url=http://snapshot_city.tripod.com/celstructure/][img]http://snapshot_city.tripod.com//sitebuildercontent/sitebuilderpictures/2ginjifun.jpg[/img][/url]

The Doctor : … and then, just to finish off, I’m going to wipe every last stinking Dalek out of the sky !
Dalek : But you have no weapons ! No defenses ! No plan !
The Doctor : Yeah ! And doesn’t that scare you to death ?
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Ashura
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Post by Ashura »

Now that was quite funny!

/heh
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I'm not a bad girl......

I'm just a good girl being bad for you
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Cloud
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Post by Cloud »

Why now? I'm glad you find this amusing.
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The Three Laws of Robotics:
1. A robot may not injure a human being, or, through inaction, allow a human being to come to harm.
2. A robot must obey the orders given it by human beings except where such orders would conflict with the First Law.
3. A robot must protect its own existence as long as such protection does not conflict with the First or Second Law.
-I, Robot (Asimov)
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aernath
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Post by aernath »

:P I actually think I liked the last one the best! :P
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Cloud
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Post by Cloud »

Peoples tastes are always changing.
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The Three Laws of Robotics:
1. A robot may not injure a human being, or, through inaction, allow a human being to come to harm.
2. A robot must obey the orders given it by human beings except where such orders would conflict with the First Law.
3. A robot must protect its own existence as long as such protection does not conflict with the First or Second Law.
-I, Robot (Asimov)
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SME
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Post by SME »

LMAO! I especially liked the last one, thanks for a good laugh JWR! :D
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  • "If us girls can't be strong, then we can't protect the boys we love." - Naoko Takeuchi
  • "Anyone who sees me has a date with his maker." - Shinigami
  • "WHAT!??! Men in pink!? How bizarre!" - Vegeta
  • This message has been approved by Welcome Consumer...got questions? She's got answers. :P
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