etiquette question

graymouser · Post by **graymouser** » Sun Aug 06, 2006 9:03 am

This has happened to me a number of times over the years and I suspect is about to happen again. I am never sure what would be considered a fair course of action.

Here's the scenario.

I see a nice cel for auction. I am moderately interested in it, but I know that it is on someone else's wishlist. I decide to email the person who has it on their wishlist and let them know about the auction. Days pass and I don't hear back from them. The auction is close to ending and there are no bidders.

Without hearing back from the other person, I have no idea if they got the email, if they are still interested in the cel or simply can't afford it at this time. If they are no longer interested, then I would feel free to bid. If they are interested, but plan on snipping at the last second, I don't want to accidently raise the price/outbid them.

I guess my question is whether most people would consider appropriate to bid if I have not received any reply to my email and wait until the last hour or less to bid (I can't always babysit these auctions to the last minute).

kittens · Post by **kittens** » Sun Aug 06, 2006 9:23 am

I would bid if I do not hear from them b/c I would never know if the person is interested in or not......

Just for my two cents

Cloud · Post by **Cloud** » Sun Aug 06, 2006 9:23 am

What would make you bid if I do not hear from them bc I would never know if the person is interested in?

SME · Post by **SME** » Sun Aug 06, 2006 9:27 am

Graymouser, that's really considerate of you!

I have a similar agreement with a few collectors regarding wishlists or cels that is a "must have."

Generally, I do the same as you. I'll e-mail the person and wait for their response. However, if I do not receive the e-mail back at least an hour before the auctions closes, I think it's fair game for you to just go ahead and bid. At least you know you tried to contact the person. Sometimes the person may be out of town, or something happened, etc.

As long as you tried I believe that's all that matters. Good luck on deciding what to do!

vampyreshoujo · Post by **vampyreshoujo** » Sun Aug 06, 2006 10:13 am

I agree with kittens. If you never hear back from them, I think you should go ahead and bid. You can't read their mind, and, if it turns out they don't plan to go for it anyway, you shouldn't have to miss out on it just because they lack common courtesy.

In the end, do what makes you feel comfortable, but I don't think you should feel bad about bidding if you never hear back from them.

blueheaven · Post by **blueheaven** » Sun Aug 06, 2006 10:31 am

I agree. I think you've gone further than most people would have gone already. You've done your bit to be courteous, so now it's up to you to bid.

Cloud · Post by **Cloud** » Sun Aug 06, 2006 10:32 am

Perhaps. Me? What makes you think I have gone further than most people would have gone?

RoboFlonne · Post by **RoboFlonne** » Sun Aug 06, 2006 11:05 am

You really like it! Bid on it!

And if you find out later that they really wanted it, then you can sell it to them at your bid price!

Many times people may forget or check their emails less often when life gets busy!

wELCOME cONSUMER · Post by **wELCOME cONSUMER** » Sun Aug 06, 2006 11:08 am

blueheaven wrote:I agree. I think you've gone further than most people would have gone already. You've done your bit to be courteous, so now it's up to you to bid.

Ditto.

Save for a very small number of people, I wouldn't even bother contacting
someone about an auction. Typically, I don't have time, forget or assume
they've already seen it. If it's something I'm interested in, I go for it. With
most auctions and transactions, you'd never know who else was interested
in the item anyway. It just so happens cel collecting has a community attached.
But I prefer going in blindly and bidding what I want. If they are willing to
pay more, then they'll win.

I commend you Mouser for being such a considerate person. If you don't
hear back, just bid. The other person has a fair shot at the auction, just
like you, so don't worry about it. Good luck!

Krafty · Post by **Krafty** » Sun Aug 06, 2006 11:51 am

I've been there too and it leaves you in limbo when you don't know if that person will bid or not, or if they just didn't receive your message.

When I write to other collectors in that instance I basically include:
"if you don't wish to bid please let me know because I'd like to go for it"

With a direct question like that they would be more inclined to reply. If they don't, then you've declared your honest intentions and should go ahead with the bidding.

aernath · Post by **aernath** » Sun Aug 06, 2006 4:26 pm

I just wanted to say that's incredibly nice of you!

As mentioned before, if they really want it later, and if you feel so inclined, you can sell it to them.

Otherwise,

Great Catch!

graymouser · Post by **graymouser** » Sun Aug 06, 2006 5:16 pm

Thanks everyone, that helps a lot. Sometimes when your too close to the situation its hard to be objective.

GuyvarIII · Post by **GuyvarIII** » Mon Aug 07, 2006 11:04 am

I don’t have this problem. If I’m bidding on something, I try not to mention anything about the auction or the show. When I mention an auction to someone, I never even look at the auction again. Even if it’s from a show I’d like to get, I come to the conclusion that I’m not going to bid on it before I tell anyone. By telling other people I’m possibly increasing my competition and I feel that if I do bid on the item then I’m an “Indian Giver.” I’d feel like an Indian Giver if I told more than one person.

People can get nasty. I don’t know what someone has or hasn’t seen and making deals can lead to strange feelings of entitlement. At the time of auction the item is not mine and it’s the seller’s job to create interest in their item. If I don’t bid on something that I can and want to get, I’m artificially lowering the price and cheating the seller. I’ll tell people about things they want and I’m not going to get (because of cost, interest, or how much mad money I have), but I don’t make deals regarding items that aren’t mine. It’s not fair to the seller.
This is just my opinion.

graymouser · Post by **graymouser** » Mon Aug 07, 2006 9:04 pm

I don't want to give the wrong impression. This was not a wishlist cel for me. I was only moderately interested. I would be much happier knowing someone else got their wishlist cel. I have no trouble being an aggressive bidder if it's a cel I really want.

I like the idea of offering to sell it for the winning amount later. I tried that once about four years ago. Things did not turn out as well as I would have liked, but maybe with a few changes it would be better.

I have to admit I never thought about it from the seller's point of view. I guess it's because I tend to buy more than I sell. The only times I have sold cels on auction was to thin my collection, so I didn't care a lot whether I profitted or not. I can see where arrangements not to compete, or to split auctions would lower the final sale price to the detriment of the seller. Both are so commonly done that I didn't think much about it.